Last weekend I went up to Crystal Lake, the little cirque lake below Mt Hough and to Taylor Lake, both in Plumas County above Indian Valley. I went with Linda and Ann who were both friends to Michael. Our last camping trip with him, all together was last August in the Caribou Wilderness… a wonderful trip. It was so exactly perfect to be up in the high country again, with the changing weather and the chilly lakes. M and I had been to these two lakes last July and it was nice to share them.
By the way, I sold the cab-over camper! A young couple from Maine bought it and I hope they will be happy and safe with it. It was good they were young, flexible people because some of the issues… like with the jacks and the wiring turned into hurdles I didn’t anticipate. Thanks to Richard for connecting them and to Bob for helping them get going. It was already the end of that era so I was 98% relieved and only 2% saddened to see the thing leave.
I did end up going on an anti-depressant, speaking of sadness. I think how I am now is better. I still feel like I’m just treading water but it doesn’t have the negative over-lay, that stuck in a hole feeling. My joy is still muted. However, I think my energy level is up a notch… I’ve got to see.. a little problem with sleep, a little nausea… who knows?
It’s a lovely day in Arcata. I’m with my old friend Angela and her family. We just went up to Trinidad and climbed around on some cliffs over the multiply blue ocean and that was enjoyable and the beauty was palpable but I pooped out on the day and am resting now instead of heading out on some new adventure. Is that normal? I can’t say anymore….there is the age thing as well as any other reason to be less motivated. Maybe the fact that it is hard to sort out means that it isn’t so much about the grief anymore… I could be just lazy.